Your computer loves you and wants to kill you

Via Boing Boing, a scan of a computer "how does it work" book from the 70s... with some surreal photoshopped edits.

Remember, however, that electricity is like magic: no one really understands it, and it is very dangerous.

If computers are not regularly fed with programs they may become listless and unhappy.

When the kitten is ready, the Encyclopedia Brittanica is first consulted, then Wikipedia. If the answer is not obtained, the kitten hands control of the operation to the puppy, which then consults Google.

Poem written by a computer for its operator:

If I could feel, I would feel love.
If I could touch, I would touch God.
If I could see, I would see truth.
If I could dream, I would dream.
And if I could kill, you
would
be
first